A new beginning in the marketplace

I am sitting at my desk, at home, at 8:46pm... finally having some time to my own and *Finally* having the mood to journal after the period of roller coaster / transition. My last day of work with Singapore Campus Crusade was on 16 June 2010. And on 17 June 2010, we were declared a single income family, and Johnson became the breadwinner of the family. It was funny though, because Johnson let out a roar, "I ammmmm now the breeeeeaaaaaddddwiiinnnnnneeerrrrrr!" *Faints* He's really a very funny and supportive husband. :)

I started clearing my leave from Campus Crusade since 3 June 2010, and since then I've been resting, meeting up with friends, going out for coffee with girlfriends, looking for the "promised land" that God has prepared for me and waking up at 10am everyday! :) It's been a really good time for me as I finally had time to go for facials, pedicure once with Jennifer, attended 2 friends' weddings, attended a Church camp from 14-17 June in KL, extended our KL trip from 17-20th June to visit Sarah and David, and attended my younger sister's graduation! :)
She's finally graduated! :) so proud of her!
The church camp was a great time of ministry Johnson and I had with God.. we managed some time to pray for our marriage and for Johnson to lead as the head of the household, for our inlaws family issues and our relationship as a married couple. It's been a long journey and tomorrow marks 11 months ever since the boat rocked through the storm for us. We are thankful to God for how He has brought us through the storm, for uniting our hearts, healing our souls and strengthening our bond and love for each other. That said, I am proud to say that we have a stronger marriage as compared to the one 11 months ago. Indeed, "No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it" 1 Cor 10:13

Ever since I tendered my resignation in April (2 months notice), I have sent out more than 20 resumes, went to 6 companies for all in all, 9 interviews. And it has been a journey of faith as I knew what God has wants for me this season in my life, yet I do not know where He wants me to be:
1. To focus on building a Godly Christ centred marriage
2. To find a job that I can tap on my management skills and learn something new
3. To find a job that avoids direct work, so that my emotional reserves can be reserved for my marriage and family this season
4. To love God and love Johnson

After much prayer and wise counsel over the past few months, God has allowed me much wisdom and peace, He spoke clearly to my heart during crunch time, when I had to turn down 2 job offers and risk not having any job in the near future.

God has never been so real to me in my life until when I finally came down to the final 2 job offers... one non direct work and one partially direct work.

"The watchman opens the gate for him, and the sheep listen to his voice. He calls his own sheep by name and leads them out. When he has brought out all his own, he goes on ahead of them, and his sheep follow him because they know his voice. But they will never follow a stranger; in fact, they will run away from him because they do not recognize a stranger's voice." John 10:3-5

Jesus reveals Himself to His sheep in such a way that they'll respond... He does not force them to follow Him but they are willing to follow... He's act of revealing Himself and His voice to me, to allow me to recognize Him is solely by His grace. God's effective Grace for me :) On the night before I went to the company (that God knew that it was the place He wants me to be, but I didn't know), I prayed with Johnson to seek His wisdom in accepting the right offer that He has for me. I remembered feeling very anxious after I called up a few friends who worked in that company, as they shared some good and also very challenging things within the company, that I may have to brace myself for a steep learning curve and work if I chose to enter the organization- and I panicked. I haven't worked outside of ministry work for 4 years and surely, going into a management job isn't something that I am totally familiar and confident with, especially I have been working in a direct and empowering work for the past 5 years!! At that juncture I panicked and complained to Johnson that I should have remained in SCCC and said that I will choose the direct work one as I'm more familiar with the work! But Johnson held me down and said, "Ask God for a sign dear, let's pray."

Half way through our prayers, in the most miraclous manner, never had I ever experienced before, God spoke. God spoke the most direct words that I ever needed to hear, from the head of my household. God knew that I needed to be submissive to my husband and I was working on for the longest time. Johnson was dumbstruck, and he paused his prayers and stared at me. He held my hands and said, "God has something for you. Tomorrow you will go into the promised land, do not be afraid of the grasshoppers." "Are you kidding me?" I asked Johnson. We knew it was God, because it was the similar passage that God used to assure us out of the land of Campus Crusade - the passage on the Moses and Aaron bringing the Israelites out of their wilderness (numbers 14). But this time round, God reminded Johnson of the 12 spies that were sent to the promised land in numbers 13. And my friends whom I've called were like the spies that God has placed graciously for me to encourage me, but I became worried and panicked instead, and I began to complain like the Israelites, to God, for bringing them out of the wilderness - when I realized my mistake, I was so gulity of the complaining and the blaming.

We went to the bible to read what God has intended for me through Johnson, the passage on the 12 spies, and found this at the end of numbers 13... "Then Caleb silenced the people before Moses and said, "We should go up and take possession of the land, for we can certainly do it." But the men who had gone up with him said, "We can't attack those people; they are stronger than we are." And they spread among the Israelites a bad report about the land they had explored. They said, "The land we explored devours those living in it. All the people we saw there are of great size. We saw the Nephilim there (the descendants of Anak come from the Nephilim). We seemed like grasshoppers in our own eyes, and we looked the same to them."" Numbers 13:30-33

I made a cross reference and looked into the study bible to find this:

From Matthew Henry's complete commentary:
v. 33. They spoke as if they were ready to tremble at the mention of them, as they had done at the sight of them. "O these tremendous giants! when we were near them, we were in our own sight as grasshoppers, not only little and weak, but trembling and daunted." Compare Job 39:20, Canst thou make him afraid as a grasshopper? "Nay, and so we were in their sight; they looked upon us with as much scorn and disdain as we did upon them with fear and trembling." So that upon the whole matter they gave it in as their judgment, We are not able to go up against them (v. 31), and therefore must think of taking some other course.

But, though they deserved to be posted for cowards, this was not the worst, the scripture brands them for unbelievers. It was not any human probabilities they were required to depend upon, but, (1.) They had the manifest and sensible tokens of God's presence with them, and the engagement of his power for them. The Canaanites were stronger than Israel; suppose they were, but were they stronger than the God of Israel? We are not able to deal with them, but is not God Almighty able? Have we not him in the midst of us? Does not he go before us? And is any thing too hard for him? Were we as grasshoppers before the giants, and are not they less than grasshoppers before God? Their cities are walled against us, but can they be walled against heaven?

And I was fully humbled by God's immerse love and grace for me to assure me that He is leading me into the Promised Land that has milk and honey, and He'll protect me from his grasshoppers (his people) in that land.
I messaged by pastor and he said that God will surely reveal to me and keep the door for this organization open if this is the place He wants me to be in... and when I was walking to the organization the next day, I came across a land of greens and a train came by, as if I was crossing over to the Promised Land:

and God impressed on my heart with Psalm 127:1 that He has built the house for me, "Unless the LORD builds the house, its builders labor in vain. Unless the LORD watches over the city, the watchmen stand guard in vain."

And of course, the organization did offer me the job willingly and granted me a position that I can continue to do my social services, and management work. :)

I started work on 14th July at National Council of Social Service (NCSS) as a Senior Executive in the department of Family Services, and today's my 4th day of work :) Here's a glimpse of my new desk!
It has been a steep learning curve, but God has been gracious to me. He has granted me great understanding colleagues, a wonderful team of supportive young ladies to work with and Spiritual encouragers too! Though the work is challenging and I am learning things afresh, it has been great and I am looking forward to work! :)

Johnson has tendered his resignation and moving on to the Promised Land God has for our family :) He has been offered to be a Primary school PE teacher and will commence on his one year teaching contract before NIE training on 13 September 2010!

It is going to be a major transition and a new ministry for us! We are both excited to see how God will continue to lead us and use us as we enter into the marketplace to be the Light and Salt for Him!

Please continue to pray for Johnson and I as we adjust to our transitions!
Pray for our walk with God and our marriage to persist in His presence and love. :)
Pray that we will be His light and Salt in our workplace!

Thank you all prayer warriors! :) Till the next post! We'll be updating our pray requests here! Please leave your footprints and tags! :)

love you lots!